New smells

I recently changed some of my beauty products and now I spend the day in a fog of new smells. I don't like scented products, so nothing I wear is particularly strong, but there's a definite adjustment period while I walk around in a vanilla and green tea cloud for a while.

Taking a leaf from my friend Heather L's book, I'm posting a product endorsement. My new shampoo is Burt's Bees Color Keeper Green Tea and Fennel Seed. Having naturally curly hair means a struggle to find shampoo with no detergents in it to dry hair out. Dry hair is a curly girl's worst enemy! In fact I have just started to use shampoo again after a two year hiatus. Don't get grossed out! I cleaned my hair every day, I just used conditioner to do it. I boosted my curl power a ton, and always smelled fresh and sweet, as is my nature. Anyone who knows me will tell you I'm fresh.

Private pain in a public forum

For the past few months I've been going through the most wracking grief process I've ever experienced. In many ways it is worse than losing my mother. After years of therapy, I'm much more in tune with my emotions and how I react to situations. I also know that change is possible, as it applies to the person who desires to change, with determination and time. I've got plenty of determination, but no patience. I want to feel better NOW. I want to stop caring NOW. I want to stop hoping for a result that is pure fantasy NOW.

Trying to manage the combination of loss, betrayal, longing and love I feel every day is exhausting. What do you do when you want to hug and shake the crap out of someone in equal measure? I feel like shouting "Wake up, stupid!" in someone's ear. I should shout it in my own as well.

Dusting the Ashes

I was cleaning house today in preparation for guests next weekend. I keep my mom's ashes in a box hand crafted from rare woods. The box sits on my bookshelf in the living room. I see it every day, but today, while cleaning it, I had to really look at it. It's a gorgeous box, but that's not my mom.

Mr. Anderson...

I took a superhero quiz. I tend to agree with the results.

I see the same cat all the time. There must be a glitch in my program.

You scored as Neo, the "One". Neo is the computer hacker-turned-Messiah of the Matrix. He leads a small group of human rebels against the technology that controls them. Neo doubts his ability to lead but doesn't want to disappoint his friends. His goal is for a world where all men know the Truth and are free from the bonds of the Matrix.

Which Action Hero Would You Be? v. 2.0
created with QuizFarm.com

12 of 12 October 06

4:50 AM Hitting the snooze button for five more minutes before I have to get up and go to the tear down of this week's trade show. Last night was the long night for the show. We didn't even get out of the convention center until 9 PM, so morning came really early today.


5:20 AM After going to the pet emergency room on Saturday and again on Sunday, Pepper has to be medicated twice a day. I prepare his morning dose before I feed him and Flannel, so that he is enthusiastic about eating anything I put in his mouth.

8:10 AM Arriving at the convention center to coordinate the tear down of our booth. It takes so long to set up, it's kind of amazing that it only takes one day to pack everything up to move out. The area around the convention center is a ghost town compared to the activity during the show.

9:20 AM Shipping our driver simulator back to Salt Lake takes a lot of padding and wrapping. The supporting electronics go on the empty pallet behind the device, and everything is shrink wrapped for shipment. What a glamorous life I lead. Prince should write a song about me. The bonus in this picture is we get to keep the phone!

11:30 AM With everything packed and labeled, I can leave the convention center for some down time. Working trade shows is hard when every day is at least 12 hours long and the concept of a weekend is completely negated. The new convention center has some great art installations. This is a good one; composed of bar stools, guitars, bicycles, kyaks and tennis racquets.

11:45AM I saw these kids as I was walking to my car. They must be out on a field trip. They're all holding on to a yoke of some kind. When that one kid took a tumble, I thought they would all go down like dominoes, but the rest of them stayed on their feet and there were no tears, so everything worked out.

12:30 PM I use Half.com to sell books that I don't want anymore. I had two to send out today. I'll use the $5.00 I make to get a Chick-fil-A or something. Emril's fried chicken recipes are never as good as those sandwiches. Getting right with God has it's benefits, I guess. Good times!

3:40 PM I'm back home and catching up on the episodes of Dexter that I missed. I love this show so far. Who would think of making a show out of a do-gooder serial killer concept? Showtime, that's who. They're trying so hard to be better than HBO. Now that the Sopranos and Sex in the City are out, they may have a shot. My question is: How does he dispose of HIS bodies? I mean, he kills TONS of people. Where does he put them all?

7:28 PM Taking care of some bookkeeping that fell by the wayside this week. I'm good about keeping on top of it, but the emergency vet visits mean Ramen noodles for me for a few weeks. Isn't it gross when your animal's food can cost more than your own? Pepper has to eat special food forever so that he won't have to go to the ER again.

8:30 PM Now that I've sorted the lean from the slightly less lean (no fat in the budget), I'm ready to make up my shopping list for the next week. Pasta is an economizer's friend. It lasts forever and you only need a few ingredients to make it fantastic.

10:34 PM The man himself, Pepper, comes in for some bedtime pats. A careful reading of his Mood Nose indicates that his happiness and relaxation is increasing. You can tell by the intensity of pinkness. He was feeling so bad since the weekend, it was nice to hear him purring again.

10:46 PM Reading a few chapters before falling asleep. I really should be reading my book club book, since we'll be meeting soon, but none of the shops around me are stocking it right now. That's okay, my brain is so fried that an easy read is just the ticket.

12 of 12

If you are new to 12 of 12 - here are the basics:
1) ALL PHOTOS MUST BE TAKEN ON THE 12TH OF EACH MONTH.
2) After you post your pictures onto a webpage of your choice (Livejournal, typepad, MySpace, Flickr, etc...) please post the TIME, LOCATION, and A SMALL COMMENT in the pic.
3) You own the rights to all of your pictures. The idea "12 of 12" is Chad Darnell's. While credit is not necessary, please don't credit someone else with the idea.
4) The original concept was at least one body part in the picture. That idea was slowly faded away. The important part is that it is 12 pics.
5) The monthly Bonus pic is a 13th picture and is optional.
6) When referring to the project, please refer to it as "12 OF 12" - not "12 ON 12."
7) Once completed, please e-mail or post the PERMALINK of the post AND the city and state or city and country of WHERE THE PICTURES WERE TAKEN. (If you are on vacation, it's where the pics were taken.)
(The permalink is the link to the ENTRY of your page. If you just send me your website, I have to track it down. By listing the permalink, it helps for people to go back and view your previous 12 of 12 entries from previous months.)
ANYONE is welcome to join in, even if you've never done it before! I hope you will.